2011 04 24 Richard's first post transplant birthday

After realizing that facebook isn't the greatest tool for archiving my thoughts and such, I decided I needed to get back into my blog. Today I posted on facebook what a wonderful family/friend get together we had yesterday. I don't want that memory to get lost after a few pages of entries, so I'm going to reverse my thinking. I'll post major memorable things here, then highlight them on facebook to share.

Last Sunday, 2011 04 17, we had a picnic at Veteran's Park for brother, Richard's first birthday post transplant. It was a lovely day with a great turnout of family.
Attendees: Richard and Levona
Donnie, Mary, Austin
Bryan, Felicia, Ryan and Sarah
Dad and Brandy
Mandy, Stellie and Eric
Tiffany, Brad, Haydan and Haylee
Tricia, Hunter and Trevor
Beth and me
Absent: Robbie had gone to Amarillo for a training class in his prison ministry and Kim was babysitting his sweet Shelly. Sean was working in Austin so he wasn't there. Of course, Richard's sons Eric and Jayme live out of state so we missed them as well.

Donnie had come off the road to go with Austin and Mary to Ennis for bluebonnets and drag-racing so he was home. Tricia and the boys were late but got to make it after she attended a training class at church.

Tiffany was really responsible for thinking up having a party for Richard. She wanted to be sure he knew we all realized how important this first birthday was. In February it didn't seem that he would have many, if any, more birthdays to celebrate. His health was failing fast. More about that in another post. Tiffany really thought it would be cute to do an all out "1st birthday" but as the time approached so fast we gave up on that. Tiffany and I talked and decided to have a celebration outside was most appropriate because he would have needed a mask if we had it indoors, and as he was the guest of honor he shouldn't have to be accomodating to us. So the picnic was a great solution. We decided on Veteran's Park in White Settlement because there was an air show at the base that day that several family members wanted to attend, and the park was close to the base. We decided sandwiches, hot dogs and pot luck were good choices. Tiffany laid out a great spread, and Bryan and Felicia brought healthy options for Richard's diet. Her fruit salad was great, but the pasta salad was off the hook! I stopped and picked up tacos from El Ranchero that were well received.

Mom used to be so great at doing picnics. {She was so great at everything!} This day reminded me a lot of times with her. Beth reminded me of the stacking pans she had. The park was lush and green and the kids had a great time playing football, going down to the stream to play and climbing on playground equipment. I was so happy Bryan and Felicia could come so the kids could play with Sarah and Ryan. We never get together enough with them.

The highlight of the day for me was when Richard blew out his candles. I realized he had not been able to do that for the last two years, and if not for the amazing doctors at North Hills hospital getting him to St. Pauls in Dallas, we would have had nothing to celebrate this year.

It was a gift to the donor family as well, in my opinion. As he blew the candles out, I wished for their peace and offered a silent thank you to them.

2007 12 27 Blessings

I was just reading a post on the grandparents' website and was reminded of all the blessings I have. It was a tough holiday, worrying about the little ones having a good Christmas. It was only about a week before that I just accepted that they would have a good Christmas even if I didn't have a lot of money to spend on them, I just had a peace come over me not to worry about them. I hate it when people equate Christmas with dollars anyway, so I let it go and just bought a few things that I felt I could afford and that I knew they would enjoy. Now I sit and review the pictures I took and realize that probably the very most precious gift I gave them was the gift of not feeling pressured into spending money we didn't have but instead, taking the time to play with them, spending time helping them learn new things instead of worrying about how clean the house was, and taking them to see family that wanted to share their blessings with them.

It was a beautiful Christmas and I'm so thankful I realized beforehand that I didn't need to stress over the "perfect" holiday, I just needed to relax and enjoy the blessings that the little children bring to my life every day.

2007 11 20 Halloween

Flower Mound Pumpkin Patch - I love to go there, and we always get such vibrant photos. This year I took the little ones and their mom and my mother-in-law, Grandma Molly. We met my nephew, Bryan, his wife, Felicia, and their kids Ryan and Sarah there. I was hoping it would be a time when the kids could bond we never could be them all in the same place at the same time, it was just such a big place and each of the kids had their own idea of what was the most fun. we did manage to ride the hayride together, but there was so much to see on it that they kids were busy watching the scenery and didn't visit, but all in all I think everyone had a great day.

For Hallowen, we took the little ones to the mall and they were a huge hit. All the store employees made such a fuss over them, and they were both so well behaved and always said "trick or treat" and "thank you". I was so proud of them. I thought it was so funny when we were leaving. They had their treat bags filled with so much candy, but they couldn't resist the wall of candy machines near the exit door. It was too colorful not to take the shot. The kids were also very polite about their candy at home. I was afraid I'd have to hide it after the first day to keep them from trying to get into it, but everyday when they asked I'd let them have a few pieces, then tell them it was time to put it up. They always handed me their bags and never asked for it again til the next day. I never did have to hide it from them. They never cease to make me so proud of them.

2007 11 13 Shoes

I haven't posted about Halloween because I've been ill again and haven't downloaded the photos. I hope to accomplish that this weekend, but I did want to post something Haydan did yesterday.

He started to take his shoes off near me and I teased him saying "no, no, not here, take them off in the hallway!" He has very stinky feet and I really didn't want to smell them. He knew that's why I didn't want him to take his shoes off near me and I could see him thinking of a solution. Well, he found one. I had an airwick room freshener on a table nearby. He said "how about I put my shoes on there?" and he took his shoes off and set them near the air freshener. He came back and forth about every 4 or 5 minutes to see if his shoes had soaked up the good air yet. I was so impressed at his problem-solving process. He knew the purpose of the air freshener and applied it to the problem his shoes presented and put two and two together! He is only 4!

The other night he came in to tell me something funny from Spongebob. He said Plankton was wearing Spongebob's pants. He was laughing so hard, he thought it was just hilarious. I started laughing, too, saying how funny he would look if he were wearing Spongebob's pants. He thought about that for about a second and said "yeah, but I don't have any holes" and he pointed to his head. I laughed so hard because he had such a great comeback so fast, it was almost as if he had been thinking the same thing himself.

Well, when I feel better we are off to a sports store to find some kind of odor eater for his shoes. This old dog is smart enough to know that if a 4 year old is trying to figure out a solution to his foot odor problem, it's time to help him out.

2007 10 24 Dragons

"Fairy tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed." G. K. Chesterton

This quote was used on a tv program tonight. I didn't see the entire program, just the ending, it was about a kidnapped child who had been abused. The quote really moved me and I wanted to include it here to remind myself that, sadly, children do know dragons exist, and that it is up to caring, loving family members to teach them that dragons can be killed. My little ones came to me exhibiting a lot of fears and it breaks my heart, but they are little by little overcoming them. I wish they never knew about dragons, I wish they'd never seen one or been harmed by one, but they have, so I'm teaching them how to kill dragons.

2007 10 23 Random thoughts

Today I reminded my oldest that she doesn't have to apologize to me for not doing some things. I told her that her priorities are in order, and unless she's apologizing for not keeping her priorities in order, there's nothing to apologize for. We each have to determine what is most important in our life, and we have to set aside time in our lives for what matters most. This child is taking care of what matters most all the time, and I'm so very proud of her.

It reminded me of what I'm not taking care of in my life, how my priorities keep slipping. I explain it away due to not feeling well, or being too tired, not having enough time, lack of focus, lack of dollars, whatever...but I know those are poor excuses. It made me think of a date in the future when I may have to explain myself to someone, and I have to consider the impact of my choices on those around me.

I've been extremely judgmental of someone without realizing I'm doing similar things - yet I justify my actions while I rant and rave about theirs. I have been witnessing someone who seems to be very selfish when it comes to my little ones. Their selfishness makes me angry, yet I have been selfish in a similar fashion - so I've made the decision to attempt to counteract their selfishness. There are some activities I know these little ones would love to participate in that I'm not interested in or don't have any experience with. I've realized I don't have to engage in the "exact" activity to bring them the joy they might get from going all out in - - - let's say bowling, just to pick something specific. If they want to bowl, and I have no idea even how to bowl, I could set up a lane down the hall and knock down water bottles with a ball, or make a miniature bowling lane on a tabletop with some craft item. I could even get a board game that simulates the game so we could play it in the house rather than going to a bowling alley. There's even the option of a video game that we could play together. Just because I don't know how to bowl, doesn't really justify me taking that pleasure away from the little ones, I should find a way to bring it into their lives and let them explore their horizons.

This entry won't make much sense to anyone, but it's given me some ideas to follow through on that I think will make me feel better and will certainly give the kids a laugh or too, and that's really what it's all about, helping these little ones grow into happy, healthy adults - some day. I guess it goes back to "children learning what they live". My decision today will hopefully prevent me from needing to apologize later for not doing some things I should be doing, and eventually teach these little ones not to point the finger like I have been doing. Lots of lessons learned here and it's all thanks to someone I don't like very much at all.

2007 10 17 Let them be little

Music Video:LET THEM BE LITTLE (by Billy Dean)

Music Video Code provided by VideoCodeZone.Com

Another song that touches me deep in my soul. I hope that every child that goes to sleep tonight has their parent or someone who loves them immensely tucking them in and letting them "be little" for another day. They do grow too fast and I wish I'd enjoyed mine more when they were little. My "little ones" seem to be on the fast track to being "kids" and as proud as I am of them, I just want to keep them little as long as I can. There is plenty of time for them to learn all the grown up stuff, but the kid stuff just seems to fly by them and then it's gone, almost like the fireflies of summer. If you don't enjoy them while they're here, it's too late.

Tomorrow I'm taking the little ones to the pumpkin patch and even that will probably be something they'll outgrow way too fast. The two older grandchildren always loved going but this year it's going to be hard to find a time when they can go. Between school, parent's work schedules, football and birthday parties, they may not even get to go. So I'm taking the little ones tomorrow and if it works out that the bigger boys can make it another time, I'll go again with them, and remember how little they were the first time we took them, and wish that they would have stayed little a little bit longer.